I just want my capris

Otis has to be the sleepiest, if not laziest, creature on this earth.

This morning, he was sound asleep and I needed to get a pair of capris out of the drawer he was sleeping in front of, blocking it.

I called him. He opened his eyes and stared at me.
I clapped. He blinked.
I said, "Come here, come over here, come on Otis."
He yawned.
Finally, I pulled him out of the way. He sort of stood up and stretched, moving a couple of inches away. I seized my opportunity and got my capris out. He then rolled over, belly up, so I could rub him.

Because that's why I woke you up. To rub your belly and give you love. Not to get my pants.

He came down and ate breakfast with me (we do this every morning). He decided part way through it was a waste of possible sleeping time and went back up to bed. I had to call him to put him out before I left. He sauntered down the stairs and outside like this whole waking-up thing was completely unacceptable.

Unbelievable. My dog is a 14 year old boy.